When I Depend on The Lord, I Deepen My Faith

I know I’m a little late to be announcing my word of the year, but still wanted to share with you what I have learned from this word. My word is “Depend”, (singular, not plural 😊).

I disliked that word, and have tried to come up with another one. You see, I have a hard time depending on anyone. I learned at a very early age there were very few people in this world on whom I could depend. This made me become a very independent woman, which sometimes drives my husband a little crazy! 😂 

After struggling with this word and it staying consistent in my mind I decided to lean into it. What I discovered is because I am independent, I also have trouble giving my needs to God. I love the Lord, I know I need Him, I’m aware of His presence being with me. But depend on Him? That looks a bit different to me. How do I depend on Him when I’m an “I’ll do it by myself kind of girl”? 

Perhaps this is why God laid this word upon my heart. I too often try to jump in and do things by myself, not waiting on an answer from Him. 

Take my writing for instance. I have always loved digging into the word, comparing scriptures, looking through commentaries, and seriously seeking God’s guidance on the things I would write about. Then life got busy, chaotic, and crazy, as life has a tendency to do. While I was praying about my writing journey, I wasn’t waiting on His answer. Taking a shortcut, I stopped digging into the word, comparing scripture, and reading commentaries. I took on the “I can do it by myself” attitude”. 

That’s when God stepped in and absolutely put a stop to it. Talk about writer’s block! I would try to write something, anything and I would come up blank. Nothing was coming to mind, not even for my daily journal. So I started thinking perhaps this was not a gift that God had given me, but something I just enjoyed doing. (Satan is really good at placing doubts in our hearts trying to steal, kill and destroy. John 10:10.) 

I started praying about it, asking God to guide me and help me to find the words, HIS words to write. This is when the word “depend” came to mind. Seeking God, asking for His guidance is easy for me to do. Waiting on or depending upon His answer is where I have failed. 

Maybe you’re thinking my writing seems like a small thing to be praying about. But praying over the small things helps us to recognize our dependence on Him. How can I possibly depend on Him for the bigger, heavier issues if I don’t start with the small things? 

This brings to mind the word “deepen”. Depending on our Lord will deepen our trust in Him with every detail of our lives realizing without Him we can do nothing.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5 NIV). 

So this independent, hard headed woman is learning a new skill…….…dependence! I know I will still struggle with this, giving into dependence will not come easy for me. However, I pray I deepen my dependence on Him as I let go of myself and give more of myself to Him. 

My desire to write is nothing more than to share all He has done for me throughout my life. I believe this is something He has called me to do because of the numerous mistakes I have made from not depending on Him. He has carried me through many crises: spousal abuse, divorce, and single parenting, to name a few. I have learned, and am still learning, so much and just hope my experiences, words and faith can help someone else learn to trust, follow and depend on Him too. 

I appreciate each one of you. If there is a particular subject you would like for me to write on please drop a comment or DM me and I will “depend” on God to give me the words you need to hear. 
“Pray continually”. (1 Thessalonians 5:1 NIV.)